As leaders, maintaining strong leadership in your company is really difficult. Leadership is full of loneliness, weariness, and abandonment. Learn how to fight through those struggles to truly become a leader. Join your host, Dr. Tracey Jones, as she goes 1-on-1 with Caterina Rando on how she handles a leadership position. Caterina is the founder of Thriving Women in Business Community and Center. She helps women entrepreneurs succeed with development training, speaking training, and more. Learn what Caterina has to say about leadership and how to run it.
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Caterina Rando - Leaders On Leadership
My guest is the one, the only Caterina Rando. Let me tell you a little bit about Caterina. She passionately serves women on a mission. Her years of educating and empowering entrepreneurs make her truly masterful at providing a ton of tremendous value. She is a sought-after speaker, workshop and retreat leader and prolific author. Her books include You Can Think Differently from Watkins Publishing released in over thirteen countries and several languages. The Women's Giving Circle Guide and her latest book the ABCs of Public Speaking. Caterina also leads an annual Bliss Retreat for Women Entrepreneurs on a Mission, a sought-after speaker mastermind retreat. She also does additional programs on sales and scaling your business. It’s so tremendous.
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Caterina, Welcome.
Thank you. It's tremendously wonderful to be here.
For our readers out there, Caterina and I just connected and we have become fast friends since then. Immediately, after talking to her, I knew our leaders need to hear what she had to say about leadership.
I remember that I met your dad and I heard your dad way back when so that made me even happier to connect with you.
It's so beautiful when you cast that tremendous shadow, how we still keep living in the shadow but yet connecting and stepping into the light ourselves. Thank you so much for letting our tremendous tribe know you go way back. We are here to talk about all things leadership. Speaking of my father, one of his most prolific speeches was called The Price Of Leadership. In it, my father talked that there are some things that you are going to have to do to truly be called a leader. It isn't all just the corner office perks, flying first class and all that good stuff.
He said, “There is a price you have to pay.” Caterina, the first price that he talked about is loneliness. We've all heard that. It's lonely at the top. Can you unpack for us with your decades of experience what does loneliness look like for you? Maybe some advisement for some of our leaders out there that might be in a season of loneliness.
The first thing to know is that there is this idea that we're supposed to do things ourselves. We're the leader. We have to be alone in our leadership. What I want to strongly encourage all leaders to do is to find a community of other leaders that you get to be a part of. Not your client community or if you work for an organization, the people that you work within that organization but another community that you get to be a part of where you're not the smartest person in the room and one of many where they are also having similar challenges or completely different challenges but they're at the same level as you.
Early in my career, I didn't do that. I had a coach but I didn't have a community of leaders that I was a part of. As soon as I started looking for communities of leaders to be a part of, the more support I felt, the less loneliness I felt and the more like I felt I had people to talk to that could understand what I was going through. Your spouse, their job is to love and support you, not to be your coach or counselor and not to provide solutions because all of that can create disharmony in the home.
As a woman, when I was married, my husband wanted to fix all my problems. That challenge creates disharmony if you don't have another place to bring your challenges. If you want to have a harmonious marriage, make sure you have another place to have your leadership challenges addressed. That's where you get mentorship and inspiration. You're inspired by what other people are doing and the challenges that they're going through.
I've spent a lot of lonely time in my life. When you have a business or you're a leader of a community or company, there are sometimes things you have to do on the weekends or at night. It's a choice that we make. Choose your choice. I'm always happy to do my thing but I don't make myself wrong for doing my thing when I don't get to be at the beach or restaurant. My sister invited me to go to Sausalito for lunch and if you've ever been there, it's beautiful. I'm on the other side of the Golden Gate Bridge. She said, “Do you want to go to lunch now-ish?”
I was like, “I can't go. I have classes to teach. I have meetings.” That's okay because I can go to Sausalito with her another time. Rather than feeling bad or depressed like, “Sorry for me,” good for me because I have a thriving organization and the privilege of leading. Your perspective has a lot to do with it. At the same time, a lot of leaders do not schedule that quality family or community time. That's the first thing I do. We're planning for 2022. My vacations, retreats, not the ones I'm leading but the ones I'm going on as a participant with my leader community that I am a part of are what goes on the calendar first.
I love that you said choose your choice and don't blame yourself. We make sacrifices and balance things. What you said about is find that community. It can't be your clients but sometimes it shouldn't even be your chain of command. Even your friend's chain of command because they can't give it to you. That is the number one thing that costs me time. All things work together for good. I get it. I would say to the leaders out there at any stage because a lot of us are still developing and a lot of our tremendous readers are in their 60s starting the entrepreneur goal, finding that community out there is so critical.
The truth is for many of your readers, I'm sure, Dr. Tracey, as long as they're above ground, they're going to be leading. Retirement is not what it used to be. Retirement means you're starting something new or you're doing it a little less. You and your readers have a commitment to personal growth and learning for life. This whole discussion that we've had about finding a community to be a part of is so important because that's a place where you're going to continue to learn, grow and thrive.
Leaders On Leadership: As a leader, you need to find a community of other leaders. Not a community with the people you work with. You need to be in a place where you're not the smartest person in the room.
I could give a quick example. I was with my friend, who is also my coach. She has this leader community I'm a part of. She was doing this segment on values, helping everybody identify their values. I teach this but to this day, I'm a student so I'm listening attentively. She is talking about this value. Two things happened. One, I pointed out to her that integrity was not on her list and having known her for years, I know that she operates with integrity. Sometimes we're so much something that we don't even think about. That was my learning for her.
On my side, she was talking about this value and then she said efficiency. I've been in business for many years. I'm creative so I'm like, “Let's do this and that.” Efficiency never even occurred to me and it is part of what supports profitability so that added to my list. I'm saying this because it doesn't matter how long you've been doing your thing, how smart you are or how much experience you've had. On any given day, there are a lot of people that can teach you a lot of things or one little thing that can make a huge difference. I share that with you because your readers commit to growth and learning. There are a lot of places to get it when you're committed to it.
The next thing he said was weariness. How do you stay replenished? We're still mere mortals even though we have God's seed in us. How do we stay at the top of our game?
I'm going to tell you my elixir of replenishment and it is getting a good night's sleep. It is so simple but it is not easy especially when you have so many responsibilities and there is so much to do. The other thing that many leaders have is what I call brilliant ideas syndrome. You're never going to get through your to-do list. That's the first thing but you start to get down and then all of these new brilliant ideas come up. You want to start on those. This is something that the studies show. Successful people have AM routine and a PM routine.
Part of that routine is getting up by a certain time, getting their fitness, meditation or prayer in the morning before the action starts but then also having a shutdown time. “All screens are off by this time. I'm getting ready for bed by this time.” It sounds like I'm talking about sixth-graders but the truth is that you cannot have a vital day if you did not have a vital night's sleep. Your body wants to have the same sleep schedule.
You can't keep it 100% of the time but this idea of burning the midnight oil where maybe you did that in your 20s when you're getting ready for an exam. As you get older, that doesn't work for having a vital day. This is what the studies show that successful people have a consistent AM/PM routine and part of that includes getting a good night's sleep. That is my elixir of life. There are many more things but that is one thing that is very important to shine the spotlight on.
When are you most productive? Are you an AM? We have people get on here they say their day starts at 4:00.
My day does not start at 4:00. Let’s be very clear. If I'm having a super amazing day, I'm getting up at 8:00 and I'm shutting down at 11:00, 11:30 or 12:00. I don't start my morning appointments until 10:00 AM. That's because I want time for my exercise, reviewing my goals for my self-care, my shower. I want to do that. I work not every night but I work 2 or 3 nights a week for speaking and teaching dictates. I do Clubhouse sometimes in the evening.
Thank you for saying that because some people are way early and then I'll call them at 8:30 and they're like, “We’re already in bed.” I'm like, “Okay.” That's not going to be my natural circadian rhythm. If I get to bed by midnight, that's good but I'm up and moving. I agree. A routine is so critical. I love elixir. That's my favorite word.
I run that risk being somebody who likes to work at night when there are no interruptions, phone calls and appointments but I do run the risk. I'm enjoying what I'm doing. I could go all night and have to stop myself to get myself to bed. When you're a night creative, it's very important to get that routine going.
Any tips as a night creative? I could work until 3:00 in the morning and get up at 8:00. Five hours of sleep is not ideal. How do you calm your brain?
I have these great blue light glasses that I wear at night when I'm on the computer. What happens is the blue light stimulates your body more. You have to wear blue light glasses for being on the computer at night. You also set a time by, “All screens off by this time.” I don't think you're going to watch that movie and then fall asleep five minutes later. Turn all screens off a couple of hours before you go to bed. Have something that you do at night that helps you fall asleep.
When I'm getting ready for bed, I used to sometimes listen to different audio tapes and everything, even Clubhouse rooms with education. I listen to meditative music because if I start listening to all the inspirational messages then the brain goes back up into high gear and it's keeping me up versus helping me fall asleep. Everybody has to find those things that help lullaby you to sleep. The blue light glasses are a huge thing everyone needs in their life.
Thank you for that because I hadn't even thought of that. Even if it's researching or reading, I'm a researcher at heart so I'm always reading. I noticed that I come away and then like, “I can't sleep.” Not that I'm stressed. I just can't sleep. The next topic my father hit on was abandonment. Caterina, abandonment typically has a negative connotation.
Leaders On Leadership: It doesn't matter how long you've been doing your thing or how much experience you have. Many people can teach you new things or one little thing that can make a huge difference.
Fear of abandonment. For those of us that are in animal rescue, that's a no-no. His point was we need to abandon what we like and want to think about in favor of what we ought and need to think about. His abandonment was more of this intense focus and you alluded to it with us entrepreneurs. When the lightbulbs are going off, it's tough. How do you stay laser-focused?
Part of staying laser-focused is I have determination galore. I was talking to one of my clients who’s a productivity coach. She has done a great job of growing her sales but she wants more. We were talking about how she could do that. She blurted out, “I am determined,” with so much determination that it stuck. We have to be determined not only to keep doing our thing but be determined to keep doing our thing better. We're always upgrading. When you talk about this abandon what you're doing for something better or what you should be doing, that's the thing.
We all are doing fine but we have to have a commitment and be determined that we're going to do our work better, treat our team and clients even better. We're going to even treat and love ourselves and our bodies better. There is a determination that has to be underneath it all that has us continue to seek more. This is what infuses this idea. One of the things I've noticed in my business is that when you're always upgrading, that means you got to abandon what you're doing for the next thing but also I've seen it with people.
I remember before the pandemic, my assistant said, “Caterina, I’m moving on to my next thing.” She left. My next assistant, who’s the best assistant I ever had in my life has uplifted my life so much in so many ways, supporting me beyond, opening the door for my business to do this and that. Additionally, we've expanded our team significantly even more. She left so she abandoned me.
The truth is sometimes we stay in relationships too long and some of those relationships are professional, clients, employees or people on our team just because we think there is nobody better or we don't want to take the time to find somebody better. This is very important because your next might be the best but you have to be willing to let go of what you've got.
Abandonment is pruning. It's constantly with a discerning eye looking at it going, “This is good but the next season we're going to have to change it up.” That's tough, especially if something is good but you always got to be looking at where can I focus my resources for explosive growth versus residual momentum, more the same or this is good enough.
When you are a leader or thriving woman in business that I like to call myself, good enough is not good enough. There is always another level. It's not just a level of excellence. It's a level of joy, risk and ease. That's what I want to encourage everyone to seek more of.
I love that level of ease. My dad used to say, “Tracey, when you work your fingers to the bone, all you get is bony fingers.” Like your friend that's determined, “I'll die before I quit.” I get the whole Puritan work ethic. It shouldn't be that hard. When you're in your flow, zone and surrounded with your talent stack, you should see that confirmation of joy. The work never stops but it's a different kind of loneliness and weariness. It's not the bad kind. It's the good tire, not the bad tire.
I understand what you said about Puritan work ethic. I come from an immigrant background. My grandparents came through Ellis Island. My grandfather owned a grocery store. My other grandfather was a shoemaker. They did extremely well for themselves and built up their businesses and property. They worked their whole life and very hard. My dad is a fast eater. He would have to eat his dinner very fast when he was growing up because he had to go down to the grocery store to help his dad after he finished his dinner and dad was still working.
I'm sharing this with you because this is embedded in us. What did we see and grow up with? Even what's the lineage of our families? We get to choose too. I value, appreciate and welcome hard work very much. When the work starts to hurt emotionally and make me depressed because I'm doing it too much then that means you need to take a break. Replenishment is part of what's necessary. I also want to say this for women because women often think, “If I go to the spa or get my nails done, I'm spoiling myself.” That's replenishment, not spoiling. This is essential for people to understand.
We did loneliness, weariness, abandonment and the last topic my dad hit on was vision. A lot of times vision sounds like this esoteric, “You're a visionary.” He was down to earth. You know that. He was very pragmatic and came from a real humble beginning. He's like, “Vision isn't some Magic 8-Ball or Nostradamus. It's seeing what needs to be done and then doing it.” Embracing it and integrating it. What does vision mean for you, Caterina? How do you continue to hone and refine it as you grow your business and lineage?
Vision is not one of my challenging areas because my brilliant ideas syndrome usually gives me lots of visions more than I have time to pursue. To me, a vision is that picture in the future that you can take a snapshot of once you're there of you not only doing something but experiencing something. In my case, with my business, with other people and having a positive impact. Fun is always part of my vision too. How good is it going to feel? My next thing is I want to do a big conference on a cruise ship with lots of speakers. I have a special name for the conference. That gets me very excited.
I want to say one challenge with vision if I could, Dr. Tracey. I told you my vision that's in my head, my next exciting thing. Part of the challenge with being a very creative person, which most entrepreneurs are is that the next exciting thing is way more alluring than my Thrivent sales class I've taught ten times or even the Speaker Mastermind. We have to watch ourselves because we want to be massively monetizing, creating that efficiency and that rinse and repeat with everything you already have before you start to pursue the next exciting idea. This is where a lot of entrepreneurs fall down and even leaders. I told you my exciting vision, Dr. Tracey, but it’s not on the calendar until the end of 2021 to even start working on it. Why? It’s because you have to be solidifying what you've already got before you start the next thing.
There is no plan B when you still working on plan A. This took me to marketing. Who needs to learn? Stop going out there and looking for new customers. Focus on the ones you have right there. The things you were saying inspired that to me. Do with them and let them be your marketing arm, not just picking an ad word, nothing against Google ad words. They're not going to magically work but you take care of your tribe. They go out and spread the word. You're all about community and that's how you grow your community.
Leaders On Leadership: When you're a leader or a thriving woman in business, calling yourself good is not good enough. There's always another level, and it's not just a level of excellence; it's a level of joy.
Community and client appreciation are also very important. I 100% agree with you. In September 2020, I started to ask my clients if they wanted to continue for the next year. We did great. We had 30 sign-ups in September for the next year. I thought it was going to be too early. There were a few people that said, “I’m not ready to make a decision yet.” A lot of people did. In 2021, I said, “Let me see if I can talk to them in August.” In 2021, we went back to August, signing them up for 2022. We got about 30 clients to sign up for August 2022.
The exciting thing about that is that gives me September, October, November and December 2021 to get all the other people on board. One of the things that I did is I looked at my client list. Just like we're upgrading this, that and the other thing, you're also upgrading your client list. I said, “Who are my clients that I love?” They're fabulous but they're not quite the right match for where we're going for whatever reason. For me, I only want positive clients that tend to be optimistic and coachable. Are we adding additional criteria?
You're always looking at, “What does it take for me to make people successful? How can I best support them?” This is important every year for people to be looking at their client list and see are there any clients that maybe you don't want to bring along next year? In the earlier years of business, people tend to take every Mary Jane and Sheila, Tom, Dick and Harry as a claim.
The more we are in business, the more discerning we get. This is very important to note. I do want to point out, we have beliefs that, “They won't want to talk to me in August.” I did have that belief but I was shocked because a lot of people were ready to get started. This is what happens when you provide massive value. Already, they're instant yes.
Caterina, you have given our readers so much great stuff. I am so thankful for that. Anything else as we're talking all things leadership that you want to share with the readers?
Perfection is not required or encouraged. A person I don't even know if it even exists and if it does exist, it's boring anyway. Here is the thing. Many people have an idea they want to get started but they're getting ready to get ready to be in and think about how they might get going. We learn in the doing. Perfection is never a goal. Mastery is the goal.
This is why people need to get started because the more they push off getting started because they're getting ready to get ready, not only are they pushing off their mastery, they're also pushing off any revenue or upgrades associated with that change. This is key and important for people to recognize. We don't care about perfection. We're pursuing mastery and that comes from getting in action.
My dad would say that too, production and perfection. You're never going to get just right but every decision you make turns it into the more perfect version. We don't know where we're going to wind up. That's the journey. Works in progress. Beautiful pieces of art take years and decades as all the layers are unfolded, the brush strokes and the tapestry. We're works in progress. I love hearing don't do perfection, master it. The only way to do mastery is one day and one task at a time. Caterina, thank you so much for your time. Our readers are going to be excited to connect with you. What's the best way for people to reach out to you?
Everyone can go to my website, CaterinaRando.com. If you go to CaterinaRando.com/gifts, you will see I've got business checklists there, an eBook on getting booked for speaking and all kinds of massive value. Feel free to reach out to me through LinkedIn or Facebook direct message. I'm there every day. I'm at Clubhouse. I have my Thriving Women in Biz room on Clubhouse. We have a Facebook group. I'm here to support everyone in every way that I can because Dr. Tracey, like you, I like to say a rising woman lifts all the women around her. You, my friend, are a rising woman.
I always feel so jubilant after talking to you and watching what you're doing. You are my sister in so many ways. Thank you for sharing your time, wisdom and what you're doing for so many people out there. Thank you, Caterina.
Thank you. It's my honor and privilege to be with you.
I look forward to us connecting in person in 2022. That would be tremendous. For our readers out there, thank you so much for being part of our Tremendous Tribe. If you like what you read, please be sure and hit that subscribe button out there. We would love the honor of a five-star review wherever you read the show. You make sure to put Caterina in your Tremendous Tribe too because you need somebody like her in there as well. Thank you so much for being a part of the Tremendous Legacy. Thank you for paying the price of leadership. Have a tremendous rest of the day.
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About Caterina Rando
Caterina Rando passionately serves women on a mission. Her over twenty-five years of educating and empowering entrepreneurs makes her truly masterful at providing a ton of value. Caterina is all about, positivity, integrity, generosity, community, and providing massive value while uplifting others.
Caterina is a sought-after-speaker, workshop and retreat leader and a prolific author her books include: Learn to Think Differently, from Watkins Publishing, released in over thirteen countries and several languages, A Women’s Guide To Starting a Giving Circle, and her latest book, The ABCs of Public Speaking. Caterina leads an annual Bliss Retreat for Women Entrepreneurs on a Mission, a Sought-After-Speaker Mastermind Retreat, and additional programs on sales and scaling your business.